Monday, April 28, 2008

Saturday, April 26, 2008

If you think he looks bad, you should see the other guy

So, Owen has horrible dry skin. Clearly gets it from his mother...we are never adequately moisturized. So, because of this, he has a tendency to scratch and claw at his face, head, legs...whatever. I feel terrible, he looks like he got into a fight. The other day I went to pick him up from school and he has a horrible scratch on his leg. The child isn't even walking and already he has scrapes.

So, to compound the saga of the scratch attack, Owen is now experiencing another small cough (compliments of day care I'm sure) followed up by maybe some teething (he keeps drooling really bad and putting his hands in his mouth) which gives him a small amount of diarrhea and diaper rash. YIPPIE!!!! However, my awesome child has laughed and laughed all day with family, talked, giggled, typical Owen. Just laid back...whatever.

UNTIL the REMOTE. From out of nowhere the remote falls on his poor little head. Clearly this is the straw that will break the camels back. He has been so good, so well behaved but the remote knocking him in the head has sent him to Fussy Town. He was only there for a few moments, but I felt TERRIBLE. I wanted to through the remote out the window. It was my fault but it was all I could do to not blame someone. The sofa got a stern talking to.

Thankfully all is settled. Bottle has been fed, jammies are on, lotion applied. It is night night time and I suspect that tomorrow morning REMOTE GATE will be a distant memory.

I have also attempted again for the 6,346,708 time to file and cut his nails so it does not look like he got into fisticuffs with Sam. I swear, even today when Nana gave him new toys he was knocking himself in the head with them. You would think Remote Gate would just have reminded him of that.

Oh well...till tomorrow.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Who are you people

Ok, so I have a 10 year high school reunion coming up. Still on the fence about going. Mainly because I am still a chub and was a chub in high school so I would like to have some change before I venture out to see these people.

I was recently invited to be a member of the SHS Class of '98 myspace page. I joined. Really more excited about the fact that now people can see the beautiful pictures of my awesome son.
Um, I have quickly changed my page back to private.


Seriously, I know three people...those being the same three people I still talk to on a regular basis from high school. Did I even graduate from this school? I know I am not good with names but faces I swore I would remember. I have no clue who most of these people are. Have we just all aged? I will be the girl at the reunion hoping for awesome name tags because I swear, no one will ring a bell. I felt terrible when I was pregnant and I went to a friends party and this guy comes up to me and says "You don't remember me do you?" No...had NO clue. He said we had a ton of classes together in high school. Clearly I have blocked that part of my memory. College is slowly starting to fade away. I remember some people, others I have to have friends jog my memory. (Maybe forgetting college is due to something too much alcohol. Sorry mom)

Goodness. Ashley, Monica. Please, lets meet up prior to the reunion so I can have a crash course in who these people are.

Horrors upon horrors, what if people forget me!?!?!?! AHHH. Maybe I can go and pretend to have totally been super cool, or really creative or really smart...

I invented Post It's - The pop up's because the other ones were already invented when I was in school

Thursday, April 24, 2008

I just want to squeeze him all day

Mom sent this picture to me today. It makes me smile. I have been stressed out and talking to not nice people and I just look at this new picture and it makes me laugh. Oh, the things that make him smile...if only it stays that easy. (making him laugh that is)

Too bad Mom made him look like the Gerber Baby with the silly hair do, but, still the most adorable site in the entire world. I am seriously counting down the minutes until I get to go and pick him up from school to hear all about his day. We chat all the way home.

Oh, and...I MADE A HAIR APPOINTMENT. Thank God. May 3rd I am CHOPPING THIS MOP OFF!!! Oh, I cannot wait. I seriously do not know how I will make it but...I know I will be a rejuvenated woman once this mess is cleaned up.

The Office, Greys, Lost, EVERYTHING comes on TV tonight, my DVR will be on overload. I cannot wait.

Love to all,

Monday, April 21, 2008

It's been medically proven

Owen went for his 4 month check up today where it was medically proven and recorded that he is PERFECT!!! Being the smarty I am, I already knew...and no medical school bills to pay back.

Owen weighs a wopping 16 lbs and is 26 inches long. He is the 75 percentile in weight, 90th in height and he grew into his head. Plus, the nurse said that he is holding his head up perfectly so there is nothing to worry about.

Poor fella had to get his shots though. NOT HAPPY. It was so pitiful because he was playing and flirting with the nurse and then...BAM, shot city. He pulled through like a champ though.

Now he is napping off his shots and Tylenol. Poor fella.

Bigger Baby got a new job. He is now an Operations Manager (very big deal) and has been working non-stop. I am so proud of him but I miss him and so does Owen. However, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and The Hills are all on tonight so I think it may be best that he stays at the office...I don't want to catch flack for my high school obsessions. (Heck, I may even break down and watch The Paper.)

Love to all

Team Smatties

So this year, the whole fam will be walking for a cure...including Owen.
Well, Owen will not be doing too much walking but you know what I mean.

My office does this to celebrate our co-worker that fought and won her battle against breast cancer. It is such a energizing walk and great to be around all of those women who have in memory of and in honor of on their backs, walking to raise awareness and money to fight this cancer that takes so many mothers, sisters, wives and friends away.

I am sure you have already received your email (if you didn't it's because I don't have your email address) to help me raise money for this cause. However, if you lost the link, click here. I am hoping to raise at least $125 so any help is greatly appreciated.

The walk is May 10th and I promise to post pictures of my ugly butt in the early free. GO TEAM SMATTIES!!!!!!

Friday, April 11, 2008

Head up young person

Ever see that, what's it called...the one with Paul Rudd and Jennifer Anniston and he is a gay guy who lives with her and she is pregnant with someones kid and they take dance lessons. What's it it's gonna bother comes on all the time...I'll think of it later.

Anyway, about the only thing memorable about that movie is the line that the old dance teacher says all the time, "Head up young person". Well, I have made that my new tag line for Owen...HEAD UP YOUNG PERSON.

See above, now do you see how this child is NOT a fan of tummy time. His school swears that they are giving him ten minutes a day...seriously, this picture was captured after about 20 seconds, not a happy baby.

Oh well...just thought I would share. The albatross around my neck is getting this child to hold his head up...steady!

Plus, the picture is funny and it makes me laugh.


Announcing the birth of...


Well, four months ago (on Wednesday to be exact).
What a horrible southern girl - I have not sent out the all important birth announcements to tell the world that the most precious angel has finally arrived. Mom helped and made the darn things and for the life of me, they sit in a bag hanging on the door knob to the closet door, looming at me daily to get off my rump and start addressing envelopes.
It is my goal to have those sent next week...promise.

My problem is just so darn hard finding the most perfect picture to show the world how adorable this little guy is....and since he changes DAILY and gets more and more perfect, yesterday's picture may not be as great as tomorrow's. The possibilities are endless really.

Since the weather forecast is calling for a weekend of rain and cold (do I also live in Satan's pants USA?) I will be addressing envelopes (with my excellent penmanship) and sending out the cute birth announcements for you all to display proudly on memo boards, refrigerators and in my case - electrical panel boxes. Hopefully I have enough to send out...those little boogers were not cheap...and we still had to make them ourselves. I think I have 30.

I hope that Owen does not inherit my procrastination trait. I am trying to get better - but I have HORRIBLE cabin fever and if I don't get out of my house and do something cutesy-family like I am going to scream. The NFL draft is only weeks away and if I listen to more speculative NFL draft talk I may throw a Dundie at the TV.

Well, until tomorrow (or when I finding something to blog about...I swear, it's not easy coming up with topics). I am on my way to pick up Owen from school so that he can come to my office and see the girls. The boss man and woman are out of town and it is pretty slow...I am sure I can find work to do but...Crap, there goes that procrastination thing again.

TTFN (that makes me laugh Jessica)

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Meowzers, stop doing that

My first child Sam (see above) is none to happy about the new addition to our home. Not being the worlds smartest cat (even though he did go to college) he is JUST now figuring out that there is someone new in the house that is taking up his quality time.

I am to my WITS end with this silly cat. Patience is no longer a virtue that the Bigger Baby has because on more than one occasion he has thrown the cat outside to where I have had to go track him down and bring him back in.

(as a side note, the cat is / was very spoiled and although he still has his front claws, has never been outside and is too much of a Handsome Prince to hang out with the ruffian neighborhood fat cats that control our block)

Prince Samuel J. Ray is now refusing to use his litter box. Gross - I know. I will tell you though that my house does not smell like an old ladies. We continue to clean this up...ALL THE TIME.

I have done some research and have recently found out that my cat suffers from emotional distress. Are you kidding me? Emotional Distress...come on now. Sam, instead of tee-teeing in my dining room, why don't you do what the rest of us do and over eat. Surely that has to be better than getting hit between the ears when I finally catch you. (Yes, I do believe in spanking to a point to discipline...but that is another posting)

So, it was mentioned that I head to the local Petsmart to purchase some kitty Zanax or herbal remedy to calm his nerves. even my cat will be medicated. I'm not even medicated...yet. Now my 8 year old cat has to take downers because he stresses too much.

WHAT A PAIN!!!! Every day I race home trying to beat Bigger Baby so I can clean the mess before he gets home because if he finds it first the scowling look on his face meets me at the door.

"That damn cat crapped again"

"Why, hello to you too and yes, my day was lovely"

"Whatever Jill...the cat is about to go outside"

my eyes roll, I walk away and he says something under his breath. Then I have to change to subject to the dinner menu so we can move past this issue.

Poor Prince Samuel. I think I may loose my fight if I cannot get the cat accustomed to the new addition. I mean seriously, the kid has been around for four months...I cannot believe Sam is just now catching on and taking this out on my dining room floor. Clover hasn't changed a bit...she is still sitting in the same place she was when I went into labor. She doesn't move...except for chow time.

Booo...hopefully the kitty relaxers will help, if not, I see a cat gang initiation taking place in my front yard soon.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Amendment to previous post

My mom called - confused as to why people put such personal things on blogs. I may send her a few links...putting it out there makes it a) funny, b) bearable and c) entertaining. When in doubt, put it out I say.

Any way, she said that if I am concerned about Owen's "development" I should call the doctor. Imagine that conversation.

me -- "Hi. This is Jill Ferguson, I'm calling about Owen (date of birth) and wanted to speak to someone about the fact that he is not hitting any developmental milestones. If you can please call me back at 404-xxx-xxxx."
(you have to leave messages - the nurse line calls you back)

Some time later
me - Hello
Nurse - Hi Mrs. Ferguson this is alkgfhjdf from DeKalb Pediatrics, calling about Owen.
me - oh thank you.
Nurse - you are concerned with development
me - yes, he is still not holding his head up, does not roll and is not grabbing toys
Nurse - how old is he Mrs. Ferguson (notice how they are using my name in annoyance)
me - um, almost four months (I am now getting embarrassed)
Nurse - well, Mrs. Ferguson, Owen still has lots of time to develop. Are you doing tummy time
me - no, he screams
Nurse - well you need to do that first, even if he teaches him
me - huh
Nurse - does he seem happy
me - yes
Nurse - is he exhibiting any signs of being ill
me - no
Nurse - I think you need to be patient - and stop calling
(well maybe not that, but I can tell that once they get off the phone, they will totally be telling everyone about the stupid call they just had to return)

I am a new mommy - I worry. I worried before I was a mommy, I worry more now, I have always been a WORRIER. I would and still do wake up in the middle of the night searching for things in a panic...No Jeff - IT CANNOT WAIT TIL MORNING!!! at least Gus understands me

I mean, just a few weeks ago I realized that I had been tooling around town with Owen incorrectly in the car seat. The child's head had been hanging forward for WEEKS, going on MONTHS. I would have to pull over every 5 miles to get the kid to push his head back. I swear, he was going to choke. Now, just now that he is almost too big for the darn carrier have I finally discovered the proper way to install a base in a car. Whatever Graco, your directions SUCK.

So, if you did not already know, the Bumbo chair had been the thorn in my side for weeks. Owen - this is a nice present, you need to use it...thus, you need to hold your head up. Please see pictures...I am very proud of this. However, notice how even at 3.5 months the child is already praying to God that his mother gets some sanity. Poor child. Look at that face, he is just trying to please his crazy mommy. Aunt Jessica is going to try to take him away.

But...I am VERY VERY proud of this accomplishment.

In all honesty, I think I am the one with developmental issues, not poor Owen. Plus, my hair still looks like crap. I need to call Julie. As my mother says, put on some lipstick, you will feel better. I hate lipstick (seriously it is so 1980's, use gloss) but I do LOVE to get my hair done. LOVE IT. Plus I get to catch up with Julie and that always makes me happy...where is that number again.
Until tomorrow...

Thursday, April 3, 2008

He doesn't act like anything is wrong

According to, my 3 month 2 week old should be doing the following:
1. Holding his head up when flat on his stomach
2. Rolling over, or making attempts to roll over
3. Grabbing toys or touching toys that are interesting to him
4. Calculation algebra equations

Well maybe not number 4...but 1-3, yes. Well guess what, my adorable angel is doing NOTHING of the sort. Not even attempting. Does not even care...whatever, give him the bottle.

This gets me thinking...great, now I am a horrible mother because I did not do enough tummy time with him the first few weeks. Now we have nightly tummy time cram sessions so we can keep up. The day care says he's fine...and compare him to some child that looks like a bubble head. I swear, he has a small resemblance to that kid from Mask. No thanks.

I am seriously beating myself up about this. Catch up Owen...your mother is a moron.

Breathe, breathe, breathe...
So...all of this stress is for nothing. I prayed for a happy, healthy baby with five fingers and five toes. As a matter of fact, I do believe that on more than one occasions throughout my pregnancy I made a deal with God that if he came out safely, I would never ask for anything ever again.
Amendment to previous request
Make him perfect with no issues, no problems and easy as pie to take care of and I will never ask for anything else again.

I hate the internet. Too much information to fill my small brain with worry and doubt.

We will continue to work on these milestones. I am praying that he hits them soon but in the articulate words of the Bigger Baby - "it's not as if he will be 20 laying on his back, not able to hold his head up" - geee, I sure hope not...

Maybe I am just irritated because my hair looks like crap...yea, that's it.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

How Double Doozies and Owen go together

I have recently discovered the Great American Cookie Company across the street from my office. This would have been a wonderful discovery while pregnant...however, by some grace of God, the mere of idea of walking my fat behind across the street while carrying a giant child in my tummy was unheard of. Typically I made a lunch order to whomever was going over there, yea I was that girl.

During my recent visit though, while standing waiting on the delicious goodness that is the double doozie (if you don't know what it is, consider yourself lucky, if I tell you, you will run to the GACC, get one and regret it is legal crack) I noticed that I am still Owen weight. Huh...I thought I had lost at least 8 lbs 15 oz. Not so...and I just recently found my Double Dooz.

So...all excuses aside, me and the kid are hitting the pavement and starting to walk. I am not 100% sure that the Big Baby will be joining us, but I pick and choose my battles.

Weather permitting (because you can't take a baby out when it's cold and apparently the ole' Groundhog was incorrect yet again) I will be strolling (literally) the neighborhood of East Point, kid in toe. Maybe if I'm really into it, I will get one of those fancy big wheel in front strollers...maybe even one that says JEEP on it, so I look like an All Terrain kind of girl. Baby steps steps.

So, my weekly (seriously who are we kidding) trips to the Double Dooz factory are over. Even a dinki dooz cannot save me now. It is ranch dressing in between carrots (light least Naturally Fresh, yum), peanut butter on apples, granola and yogurt.

And, if anything, I can consider this my training for the Walk for a Cure that my office does every year and every year I swear I am keeping up all while huffing and puffing my way through Atlantic Station telling my co-workers that I am just claustrophobic not out of shape. Lies...all lies. SAVE THE BOOBIES!!!!!!!!!!

Kicks here I come!!! Maybe a trip to Piedmont...anyone?